Dear Grass Is Always Greener:
Nice try, Steph, but Ash has a lot less to worry about than some of her other castmates. Hell, we know most of what Ms. Greene is trying to hide, and we might actually love her more for it. Funny stuff, trust.
What did you mean about adorable Blake Lively and her boyfriend, Penn Badgley? Are they a fake couple too?
Dear New York Minute:
Fake? No. But if you're a total Plake (or is it Blenn?) fan, you may want to keep your eyes peeled because I feel, in the long run (aka post-Gossip Girl), these two will be a blink-and-you-miss-it couple. Sorry!
I absolutely love Kristen Bell. She seems like a sweetheart, and she does a lot for the animal community. Does she have a B.V.?
Dear Veronica's Vice:
How dare you accuse a sweet little cutie-pie like her of having a nasty secret! Wait...I guess I can see why you'd think that. But no, Ms. Bell is actually as clean as they come. Plus, I heart her so much for her work helping animals.
I am 99.999 percent positive this Q will not be posted or answered, but I'll be immensely satisfied if you even read it. I find it extremely self-serving and obviously hypocritical that you mock the talentless attention whores on shows like the The Hills and refuse to report on them in several instances, but hold no bars on constantly writing about and exulting the Kardashians. So what if they have a show on E!, they still offer zero in the name of any credible skills or qualities that warrant such shameless promotion. The only reason they even have a show to their name is because one of them had sex on camera.
—Long Time Ted Fan/Kardashian Hater
I've got no problem talking about those Hills hotties if they're, you know, doing something. Like, Lauren Conrad. She a reality gal I can get behind—what with her fashion line and being a kind-of author and all. The Kardashian K's—Khloé, Kourt and Kimmy—are doing a lot more than just pouting oncamera at Les Deux. These three are building an empire with clothes, perfumes, radio gigs, etc. Sorry if you're not, but I'm impressed.
Will there ever be a gay/lesbian vampire in the Twilight films? Surely the studio has earned enough to show some love for us gay fans! True Blood certainly has...
Sorry, babe, but you'll just have to content yourself with True Blood's guy-on-guy action because Twilight is lacking in all sorts of diversity departments. Don't you just love T.B. for that? Also, how absolutely adorable is Lafayette's new BF? Too bad Taryn keeps trying to ruin him with her nasty suspicions.
You recently said Bradley Cooper was making a name as a B.V. long before he was making a name on the big screen. Are his B.V. antics the reason he actually made it in the business? Apart from being gorgeous, of course.
Dear From the Bottom Up:
Nope, B.Coop was working his way up the ladder the entire time he was engaging in his Vicey ways, just separately. He keeps it supersecret because, unlike most Vicers, Bradley doesn't even want T-town folks to know about it.
Nikki Reed. What do you think of her? Do you regret starting the anti-Nikki campaign? What direction do you see her career going in the future: Oscar winner or fade away?
I would hardly say I told you guys and gals to grab your torches and pitchforks. I've called the buxom babe out on some things in the past, sure, but I've always maintained how talented she is. Nikki is in this for the long haul and, unlike her costars, is branching out into other parts of the industry to guarantee her longevity.
I was wondering how come Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie aren't ever guests on late-night talk shows like Letterman or Leno? Or even Ellen or Oprah? They've got movies to promote, so why not? The Twilight stars are always on those shows, and I'm sure even if Robert Pattinson didn't make an appearance on Jimmy Fallon Twilighters would still go see the movie.
Dear Bitchin' Bout Brangelina:
Really, because they don't have to. Brad and Ange are mega, mega A-list, and their movies will open to big box offices whether they jump through all the talk-show hoops or not. Twilight, true, will open big whether R.Pattz & Co. pop up on Late Night, but the up-and-comers are there to promote themselves more than their flicks.
So basically Me-Me Dallas and Tobey Yum-Yum were rather young when they started hitting home runs. So if everyone really did know about it enough for it to be a B.V., then why didn't their parents put a stop to it or did they?
Dear Go to Your Room:
And piss off the gravy train? Don't bite the hand that feeds you, B. Even if it's your kid's.
I know that if there were some important news about Robsten you would let us know because we all love them, so I'll pass the temptation and I'm not going to ask you if you have news like everybody seems to be doing constantly. But I would like to ask you what do you think about Breaking Dawn being in 3-D. You think it will work? I'm seriously doubtful.
Dear 3-Dumbest Idea Ever:
Do I think 3-D for the franchise is a good idea? No, not at all. Summit, why not focus on making these last two films good (much like Eclipse impressed) and not whatever the current gimmick is to raise ticket prices?
Despite the claims that all movie sex scenes are actually very clinical, cameramen and all, I don't for a second believe that at least some don't involve actual...sex. They/you can say it's acting, but if two hotties are rolling around naked things are popping up, and in...no?
Dear PG-13 Perv:
Uh, no, Riley. There are plenty more people than just the cameraman on a movie set. And sex scenes are always very technical—what with knowing where to put your leg, how loud to moan, etc.—and done take after take after take. A very unsensual atmosphere, trust.
All those Ryan Gosling sightings reminded of something quite important: Sandra Bullock! During the whole Jesse mess, no one asked Ryan what he thought about that catastrophe (or did I miss it?) Don't you remember when the two dated—Sandra practically stole his virginity he was so young. But I wouldn't mind seeming them go for round two. Now that could be one hot couple—forget Demi and Ashton!
Dear Murder by Numbers:
Ryan is too much of a class act to ever poke his nose in someone else's business. As for those two reuniting, I would totally be down for it. Ryan is superchill and superhot, just the kind of guy Sandra needs. And hell, we could always use more cougars, no?
Just wondering when are you going to have the Blind Vice archive ready? I have been reading you for a while, but I want to go back and read the old B.V.s.
Dear Vice Vault:
Working real hard on it, Sandy, promise! But you do know how many Vices there are? Trust, this is no easy task.