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Taylor Swift, Kanye West

Kevin Mazur/Getty Images

Dear Ted:
Am I the only one that thinks the Taylor Swift-Kanye West fiasco is ridiculous? It's not like she was accepting the Grammy for Best New Artist! It's a VMA—the cable equivalent of a People's Choice Award! Is anyone shocked that Kanye is a tool? No. But what really pisses me off is the uninvolved, irrelevant "celebrities" who are taking to their blogs, twitters, talk shows etc. to condemn Kanye just at the moment they have projects to promote (ahem, Pink). Besides, I think Kanye is just still upset that he's a big, gay fish.

Dear Team Kanye:
You really think Pink called Kanye a piece of merde so you'd go see her on tour or something? She's actually talented (as if her high-flying VMA performance didn't showcase than enough)—she doesn't need manipulative tweets just to get you to notice her. And the VMAs might not mean anything to you or some other celebs, but winning her first Moon Man was an important moment to teenager Taylor who prolly grew up watching VMAs.

Dear Ted:
I wasn't exactly surprised to hear that Megan Fox is actually dumb and talentless, but I was a little shocked to read the letter from the members of the Transformers crew. She seems like an awful person! Do you think this will hurt her career?

Dear Believe What You Read:
Fab question, which we'll be addressing in length a little later today. Does it shock me that Megan is supposedly difficult to work with? Absolutely not. She's an actress—many have a sense of entitlement and are extremely divalicioius behind the scenes. But I also couldn't help feeling that whoever wrote the letter had a score to settle, like it was written by either guys who couldn't get a second glance from Meg or girls who want to be her. Ya feel me?

Dear Ted:
Do Kristen Stewart and Nikki Reed like Ashley Greene? You never see them together. And why is it that the vampire part of the cast never hangs out with the "human" side?

Dear Twilight Clique:
We've told ya for some time that not all the girls in the cast are BFFs with each other. They all get along just fine—but I would say Ash is closer with Kellan Lutz than with Nikki or Kristen. As for the last part of your question, what do you think Robert Pattinson and Kristen are doing?

Dear Ted:
How's Nevis Divine and Miss Costar's current relationship status?

Dear Relaysh Wondering:
Strictly plutonic, as far as we've heard, but they don't see much of each other.

Dear Ted:
Loved the gallery of the famous faces who are the stars of your Blind Vices—some faces we expected, some we didn't, you big ol' tease! Can't wait to search through the full archive when it comes online. Was wondering if you have any gossip about things stars do to prevent stories from going public, besides bribes, scary lawyers or sex?

Dear Powers of Persuasion:
You pretty much named all three things.

Dear Ted:
How does Jackson Rathbone feel about the whole Ashley Greene-Chace Crawford situation?

Dear Ashbone:
I'm sure they weren't his fave pics to look at, but from what I've heard, Jackson and Ashley have possibly fizzled a bit—but they're still buds.

Dear Ted:
What's your take on Jason Segel? One of the good guys?
—Girl Who Likes Guys Who Like Puppets

Dear Muppet Man:
Is he trying to get laid in H'wood? More than you know! But that doesn't make him bad. Any geeky dude willing to make a Muppet movie clearly isn't too concerned with how macho he looks.

Dear Ted:
Love your column. Is Me-Me Dallas Meaghan Martin from 10 Things I Hate About You?

Dear More Than 10 Things:
Nope, though we can count how many things we don't really like about the real Me-Me.

Dear Ted:
If Rob and Kristen are only seen "being affectionate" when they are filming a movie scene, how can the insiders actually say that Rob and Kristen are a couple and not just friends? I have believed they are an item for a long time now, but I do not understand how they can stand, or why they pretend, to ignore one another at the public events, if they are indeed in a relationship. Wouldn't you be proud of your relationship if you were in love? Kristen publicly acknowledged her ex—held hands with him at events. Why would she not acknowledge Rob in the same way?

Dear Out With the Old:
I feel like I've answered this a thousand times. I don't want to anymore!

Dear Ted:
Do you know what's going on between Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth? I think they make an adorable couple, but Miley keeps insisting she doesn't have a boyfriend. If she doesn't want him, I'll take him! Liam is yummy.

Dear Slutty Cy:
We're sure Miley has had her way with Liam. The boys just flock to her—and she doesn't mind!

Dear Ted:
I can't help it. I love Kanye. He just blurts out whatever is on his mind and doesn't even apologize for it, or if he does, he just explains it's what he wanted to say. I say hurray for people who can just let it all out there, especially in this era of publicists and lies. Not to mention he's a bloody genius.

Dear Westfest:
We're all for freethinking, too...just don't say it so ineloquently and during somebody else's moment. If he wanted to he could have waited until the show was over to blog/scream about it, but instead, he just made a teenage girl feel like crap.

Dear Ted:
After watching the VMAs, I was wondering about Jay-Z and Beyoncé. They seem like such a "tight" couple, yet they also try to keep their relationship very private. Are they as together as they seem? He is always surrounded by beautiful and talented women (Rihanna, Alicia Keyes, etc.) but I don't see him being a womanizer. And do you think Kanye will get any retaliation from Jay-Z for putting Beyoncé in such an awkward situation? P.S. I thought Beyoncé showed tremendous class, as did Taylor for that debacle. A new Beyoncé fan.

Dear All Hail Sasha Fierce:
Totally agree with you on Beyoncé and Taylor. I'm a bigger fan, for sure. Beyoncé and Jay are the real deal, and it's because they keep it private. Robsten, take note!

Dear Ted:
I gotta say...I started reading your column in May, and I'm addicted. I'm in medical school, and this is the closet escape from my books. I also love that you rescue animals—I've been passionate about that for a long time, and it's nice to see someone making it a real issue. That said, why is everyone so harsh toward Taylor Lautner? He seems like a nice, wholesome kid and a good actor. Does not having any visible "vices" mean he's boring? I almost like him better than anyone else in that cast (insert horrified gasps from Twi fans around the world). Can you give him some love once in a while?

Dear Love for Lautner:
We heart our Tay-Tay, as if it wasn't evident enough—we drool over him as much as we can a 17 year old. We just can't stand the way Summit is constantly throwing him in the middle of Robsten to keep them separate (i.e. seating arrangements at the MTV Movie Awards, Comic-Con, etc.). Plus, we know that buff bod can't keep him innocent for long!

Dear Ted:
Couldn't Bradley Cooper have done any better than Renée Zellweger?

Dear Cooped Up:
He could, and he probably will. Don't count on this Renée thing to be anymore than a phase for B.C.

Dear Ted:
Just when I think I'm over the B.V.s you give me Topher Hairy-Tuchus. The AIAs seem to point to a big movie franchise. So is the hairy one or has the hairy one been part of a movie franchise?

Dear Franchise Fella:
Not yet.

Dear Ted:
Now that Kanye pulled that stunt on Taylor, will they ban him from the awards show? What a lowlife he is. It was one thing to rant about a video award he didn't get, but to do that to Taylor is beyond low. He needs to be taken down a notch or two. Can he get any lower?

Dear Heartless:
We won't truly write Kanye off until he sinks to Chris Brown levels of horrible behavior.

Dear Ted:
Love your column, despite all the Robsten insanity. And I'm so glad you're finally starting to pay attention to my own guilty pleasure: the Supernatural (and superhot) guys. While you seem to have some kind of preference toward Jared Padalecki, I'm such a Jensen Ackles girl. So naturally I'm aware he's been with actress Danneel Harris from One Tree Hill for more than three years, now. Just wondering: Why don't they just tie the knot, already? Don't you think Jared would be an amazing best man? Many Brazilian kisses to you and your team—love them!

Dear Jackles Love:
That wouldn't be how I would arrange the marriage if I got to decide.

Dear Ted:
Justin Timberlake a Blind Vice, A-list secret keeper...that raises an eyebrow. Really makes me wonder just what kind of secret pretty boy J.T. is keeping? Wonder if he was the one caught in the coat closet a while back?

Dear No Chance:
You're on the wrong Vice track for Mr. Timberlake.

Dear Ted:
Did Jackie Bouffant work for Disney?

Dear Squeaky-Clean Kid:
Yes, the Mouse House is on Jack's résumé somewhere. Then again, Disney and ABC have a hand in many aspects of the entertainment industry. So if you think his past employer is a giveaway think again!

Dear Ted:
I am starting to get genuinely concerned about Pattinson. He obviously had a few cocktails before he spoke at the VMAs. Slurred speech, etc. I'm a drinker myself, so I understand calming your nerves with a few drinks, but when you have to speak to millions of people on TV? And I've seen previous interviews of him where he looked a little buzzed. Am I overreacting? Is this just a "British" thing, or could he have a potential issue with drinking?

Dear Binger:
Uh, we reported this ages ago. We aren't too worried about R.Pattz's tolerance—he wasn't the one slurping back a bottle of Hennessey all night and terrorizing the stage with his ego. We've all danced the dangerous alcohol dance; Rob strikes us more as the social type (although he needs some few pointers) rather than the rehab type. He's British, they get away with everything.

Dear Ted:
Which one is hotter, Robsten or Skarswood?

Dear Wishful Thinking:
How about Robsgård?