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Mary-Kate Olsen, Ashley Olsen

Dave M. Benett/Getty Images

Another day, another celebrity sex tape, this time with Eric Dane. How much money do those things make?
—Leron, Tennessee

Let's get right to the point. David Joseph, the head of the company that has released every major sex tape from Paris Hilton to Screech, says he wants to talk to Eric Dane or Rebecca Gayheart...right now, because he can make them some ridiculous money.

"I think this one could be really big," says Joseph, whose company is Red Light District, based in Chatsworth, Calif. "Not as big as Paris Hilton's sex tape, but bigger than Amy Fisher, that's for sure. It's a seven-figure amount. It's in the millions, for sure."

How about those other sex tapes? Oh, the money is good, really good...

Usually, a celebrity can make at least five figures just in advances, before a video even gets distributed to the public.

"Let's say the Olsen sisters had a celebrity tape," Joseph posits. (They may or they may not, but we sure do know who does: Pam Anderson, Kim Kardashian, Chyna...)

"They would get millions as an advance, the same as if Britney Spears had a tape," says Joseph. "But you take someone at more of a Shannen Doherty level, the advance might be $500,000." The lowest-end star, in contrast, might fetch an advance of $50,000 to $100,000.

And that's just the advance. Of course, even more money is made once the advance is paid off, assuming it is—and it usually is.

So anyway. Eric Dane, if you're reading this, you have a phone call to make.

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No, Cameron Diaz isn't in a new sex tape, but she is featured in our celebrity Beach Bodies gallery