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Blind Vice

Most featured Blind Vice babes just guest star in this blolumn, but Morgan Mayhem's practically a series regular here at the Awful Truth. Truthfully, she should be happy for the work! Especially since she's favored her drama and drug addiction over any semblance of a once spot-on career.

We're almost falling asleep at Morg's predictable downward spiral, and it looks like she's bored, too—she's looking for a change.

Not in lifestyle, like sobering up finally and screwing her head on right, but in drug choice. M2's party days of dipping her nose in the white stuff just doesn't thrill anymore, which may be why she turned to meth (wonder if her and Emma Uh-Oh ever hung out in the same crystal-abusing circles?). Morgy got bored with that, too, and has moved onto something entirely new to stick in her bod.

And it's more deadly than blow or meth, if you can believe it:

If Michael Jackson's death can be used as a cautionary tale, it's that prescription drugs, Morgan Mayhem's new fave things, are the most dangerous stuff to abuse. Why? Well, A) they're easy to get, and keep getting, as long as you get that first prescription and B) abusers don't exactly consider themselves to be abusing drugs, in the naughty sense of the d-word, since they got 'em straight from a doctor. A medical "professional" gave them to me, so it must be okay! Right?

So wrong. Morg's constantly up on Adderall, among some other happy pills. Some wouldn't be surprised that the unfocused honey's got ADD, but this is strictly for recreational use as opposed to anything M2 actually needs. Gives her a much more mellow high as opposed to an anxious tick like with blow—she can actually get some work done! Girl can actually fake being sober a lot better than she did before, which only encourages her to keep pill-popping like mad. But deep down she must know something's not right, since she still tries to hide her habit from everyone around her.

But she's not always successful: M2 was just caught red-handed with the script stuff by her dearest friends—the paparazzi. Spilled all over the sidewalk, reds, blues and purples falling out of her purse, her scrambling to pick them all back up. She begged her photo friends to erase the pics, which they did—and they would, if they wanted Ms. Mayhem to keep calling them whenever she goes out on the town.

So can't anyone help poor Morgan? Somebody?

And It Ain't: Kristen Stewart, Hayden Panettiere, Mischa Barton