Theoretically, the show should now be titled Jon or Kate Plus 8, don't you think?
TLC's hit series won't be featuring any more cozy couch moments between its titular stars, who are currently in the process of ending their 10-year marriage, nor will it be showing Jon and Kate Gosselin doing much of anything together, including parenting.
Monday's dual episodes, the first new installments of season five since Jon and Kate announced their split June 22, focus on business as usual—keeping their 8-year-old twins and 5-year-old sextuplets entertained.
First off, the caregiving ball was in Kate's court, as she bundled the kids off to North Carolina for a beach vacation while Jon supervised the remodeling of the kitchen of their Wernersville, Pa., home in their absence.
"It's kinda strange. We're remodeling our kitchen in the middle of our separation," Jon said while everyone was away. "The decision to have the kids at the beach and me at home gave us a break to think about what we need to do as parents for our kids."
Kate then presided over a backyard campout upon their return.
"I still have eight kids," she says to the camera in the latter episode. "They still are kids. They still enjoy things. They still want to do things. And so, they wanted to camp."
And while Kate wasn't necessarily a happy camper at first, she is a pretty fit, buff mom, so she got to work pitching a tent.
Things didn't get off to the most promising start, as Kate found herself being heckled by her own kids.
"Daddy knows what those are for! And daddy knows everything about a tent!" offered the innocent children as Kate fumbled with the equipment, to which mommy replied, "Wow! Well, he's not here."
So few words, yet so much said.
"It is not [the kids'] fault that what has transpired has transpired," Kate told the camera later.
"This is a very, very difficult time right now. Those words don't even begin to cover it. But my main goal is to make this transition as easy and painless, if that's possible, for the kids as possible."
Kate and Jon take turns being in residence at the family's house. Jon, who snagged himself a bachelor pad in New York City, spent last week with the children while mom was away—checking out Maryland real estate, according to one source, though others have denied Kate has any plans to buy or rent in the area.
Meanwhile, as always, the eight kids were cute—tots wearing water wings is just an adorable thing—and they provided the best moments tonight as Kate and assistant Ashley presided over the ultimately successful indoor-outdoor camping experience. (They slept in sleeping bags outside, but had to shower off any s'more stickiness beforehand.)
"Since I've once again in my life lost the ability to plan ahead and to see the future, I have gone back to my taking it one day at a time, sometimes one hour, and sometimes even a minute, at a time," Kate said.
Seeing the future would make for a dramatic half hour of TV, but until then, those campfire s'mores looked awfully yummy, and the scene with Kate falling asleep among the six youngest members of her flock was rather sweet.
Jon, who has the drama thing down, takes the reins next week—and, thanks to Kate's stick-to-itiveness, he's got a lot to live up to.
See how the Gosselins got from there to here in The Reality of Jon & Kate Plus 8 gallery.