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Desperate Housewives, Felicity Huffman, Teri Hatcher, Eva Longoria, Marcia Cross

ABC/ Ron Tom

Nicollette Sheridan, I have good news and good news: First, your fans are insanely pissed you're off Desperate Housewives soon, and second, you may soon have company in the unemployment line—from other fellow players.

First, let's give Nic a pat on the shoulder pads, as she surely needs it right now. Response to my exclusive two days ago—that Nicollette's Edie is being offed—was huge. And not just because of the surprising news, but because of who was chosen.

It was a furor in the crankyass comments section (don't you folks ever get laid?), with everybody simply seething and insisting that the wrong woman was chosen for the goodbye. Almost all irked folks nominated for the axe, instead...

Dana Delaney's Katherine. And you bitchers surely take no prisoners when stating your wishes: "Kill Katherine," Lakjak hissed, "I don't like her, we already have Bree, we don't need two. She looks so old."

Just who is this writing under the name Lakjak, Hillary Duff? Jeez, age will happen to you, too, one day, Lakky! But alas, not everybody was in camp Nic, like Miam, for ince, who said this of Sheridan's purported death-by-electrical-shock exit: "That will be one satisfying show to see Nicollette...uh, I mean Edie, electrocuted. Excellent."

Well, you darling, bloodthirsty D.H. fans, prepare for perhaps more gory demises, as inside word from money-beleaguered ABC's set just happens to be cut, cut, cut. As in costs—and talent. Wonder who's next?

"Guest stars," revealed a superinside Wisteria Lane camper. "And then, they'll go from there if they feel they need to. But for now, it's only the guest actors—that's the edict."

OK, Bree, you old thing. You're safe. For now.