HBO / Craig Blankenhorn
Every femme and fagola must be raising his-and-her martini glasses in ecstasy now that the Sex and the City sequel's a go.
But what can we expect? Will Carrie be shopping at Payless instead of Prada, since we're in a recession? That's not a romantic comedy, that's straight up horror. We asked Sarah Jessica Parker what we can expect in Sex 2, 'cause we can't wait until 2010:
"[Sarah] is a producer, like last time," says her rep. OK, so what else? How about plot points? Big dies, right? "The script has not been written yet."
Jeez, Michael Patrick King's taking so effing long at shooting out another on, we put together storylines for what the quartet of lovely older ladies should be up against in the sequel. See if you agree:
1. Carrie finally gives up smoking—because she's pregnant. Big freaks out—again—and walks out on her while she's giving birth. Carrie swears she's finally done with him. They're back together by the end of the movie. She names her daughter Gucci.
2. Miranda leaves Steve for good and unexpectedly switches teams (just like the Cynthia Nixon did). She declares her love for Carrie. Carrie writes a column about it: "I had to wonder, is boning your gay best friend a bad idea?"
3. Samantha enters menopause and gives up men for knitting. She passes down all her sex toys to her niece who comes to live with her in the big city. It is a touching moment.
4. Charlotte's fertility pills catch up with her and she ends up having nontuplets (that'd be nine) to add to the two she already has. Unfortunately, just as Evan Handler predicted would happen, Harry has a massive coronary and dies, leaving Charlotte a single mom with almost a dozen kids and no job. Or is that just too ridiculous to be believed?
—Additional reporting by Becky Bain