• Share
  • Tweet
  • Share
Heroes

NBC/Trae Patton

"You know the media. They like new and shiny."

Score one for the writers and producers of Heroes! 'Cause that snarky little line from Nathan Petrelli (Adrian Pasdar) in tonight's episode seems to take aim right at all the Heroes haters who've dissed the show in recent months. 

Tonight's premiere of Volume IV: Fugitives was all about proving that the old Heroes (the one on that not-so-glamorous cover of Entertainment Weekly) is gone for good. And now...Presto-change-o! We have a new volume! With new predators! And new twists! And new creepy government guys who look like ninja Sleestaks! What more could you possibly want?!

So did it work? And what lies ahead? Let's assess...

WHAT WE LEARNED

Guy Love Truly Can Save the World: Clearly, JD and Turk from Scrubs were on to something, because all it takes is a little hand-holding among good guy friends to regain enough superpower to save the world. Even though Peter was left dangling by a single hand—Mohinder's—out the airplane hole after gaining superstrength by reaching out to a single hand—Mohinder's—something tells me he'll be okay. (Sorta-Kinda Spoiler Alert: Sources tell me that Milo Ventimiglia is so not going anywhere this season. And Sendhil Ramamurthy is safe...at least for the time being.)

Ali Larter Is a Pretty Hot for an Ice Queen: Just two months after knocking stilettos with Nathan Petrelli (I still want to know what happened to his lovely wife Rena Sofer, BTW!), Tracy Strauss has moved on to another governing body: The governor. Why? Because you need to have good cause to put Ali in all her hotness in a robe in all its shortness at the beginning of the winter premiere, dummies! Here's hoping all these multiple personalities truly are multiple bodies, or else sister-friend might want to take a trip to the local clinic.

Sylar's Father Is a Taxidermist: As you Dexter fans know from the first guy who claimed to be the Ice Truck Killer, taxidermists are usually way creepy and way evil. However, as you Pushing Daisies fans know (and Olive Snook is about to discover), taxidermists like David Arquette can be totally cute and cuddly. So now that we know Papa Sylar (John Glover) is a taxidermist, which one will he be? Sources tell me that the writers were somewhat split on this very decision: Whether Mr. Gray would be this volume's big bad or more of a meek man who's simply misunderstood. Which way do you envision him? Either way, he will be extreme. But for the time being...

Nathan Is the New Big Bad: Not only is he rounding up all his former friends with the help of Zeljko Ivanek, but Nathan Petrelli has a whole team of ninja Sleestaks with superpower-defying armour to help take them in. What I'd love to know is, how did Nathan get to this point? Why is he rounding them up? And seriously, what did they do with his wheel-chair-bound wifey? I have questions!

P.S. I'm also totally convinced that there is a fake Hayden Panettiere in the big Super Bowl commercial, but a source on the show assures me it is her, just in a new wig. Thoughts?

WHAT LIES AHEAD

Claire's Bio Mom May Be Back. Despite those "dental records" found on the scene, we know that Sylar is alive and Jessalyn Gilsig tells me her character may be, too. "They have driven home to me that it's Heroes and so I am not dead," Gilsig says. "How could she die by fire? She starts the fire. So I think of her as sitting on the shelf, just waiting to emerge from the ashes. I just hope I don't come back with a lot of burn makeup that I have to wear."

Sylar Gets an Awesome Friend. Next week, Dan Byrd of Aliens in America (yes, some of us loved that show!) comes on and Sylar teams up with his character, Luke. Sources tell me he is a human microwave, so pregnant women should stand at least five feet away from the screen.

AND NOW THE BIG QUESTION

What did you think of tonight's episode? Based on all the questions, musings and lame jokes I entered above, you might be able to sleuth out my opinion. But this show is all about you, the fans, so please, weigh in below...

Is Heroes back on track or wiggity-whack?