We've got to hand it to Katie Holmes and Jamie Foxx. Whatever the nature of their relationship—what it was, what it is, what it may be—for two of the world's more visible people, they've done an amazing job remaining invisible as a unit.
For going on years now, the actors have been romantically linked, at some times more than others. In June, Foxx's pal Claudia Jordan seemingly backed up what everyone thought they may have known, saying in a radio interview with regard to Holmes, "He is very happy with her. I like that he seems very happy."
Alas, it turned out that Jordan was no more in the know than most people.
"I have no knowledge of Jamie with Katie at all. I've never seen them together. He's never told me he's dating her," she told ET after her show of support for Foxx was mistaken for a confirmation.
E! News has been told that the pair aren't keeping their relationship status a secret from their friends, but that must refer to the most inward of inner circles. Not only is only the slightest bit of information about where they go and what they do together available, but they've only been photographed in the same place (after Katie's marriage to Tom Cruiseended, that is) twice. Once they shared the stage at a benefit in New York and another time they were kinda exhibiting PDA in a grainy photo taken in a recording studio.
There you have the visual evidence that they've been in touch over the last 10 years.
Stuart Ramson/Invision for Quaker Oats; Brennan Lashever/ABImages via AP Images
And yet where there's smoke, there's fire, so the insiders who know for sure that Holmes and Foxx are the smoothest of operators, all-time champions at keeping a very important part of their personal lives completely off the radar (minus all the headlines ending in question marks), have still succeeded for the most part at keeping the big secret.
But even though it's impossible for anyone besides those two to know exactly what's going on, just because it isn't, like, Instagram-official doesn't mean there isn't a relationship. And if there's a relationship, that means there's a chance it can end.
Radar Online reported yesterday that it was over, that Foxx had broken things off because Holmes was over the secret portion of their journey and wanted to go public. Seriously, how could she... want something normal after finally getting over her jitters about what could go wrong if a relationship goes too public and too over-the-top too fast.
Craig Barritt/Getty Images for Avra Madison
Anyway, the report described the relationship as a little off-and-on in the first place, with Foxx now claiming he needed at least a few months of space.
Page Six followed up last night with another source supporting that assessment of events, saying, "Jamie wants to continue to act like the carefree guy he is in public. Eventually, the question had to come about whether he was committed enough to the relationship."
A source tells E! News, however, that they're still together. And not only that, they're still both so on board with the status quo, they don't mind one bit if people start going around thinking they broke up.
Us Weekly is hearing the same, with sources telling them they're "for sure still together."
So aren't we all just almost exactly where we started!
The ironic thing about all this, besides the fact that keeping tabs on Jamie Foxx and Katie Holmes is akin to wondering how Mr. and Mrs. Claus are doing during the rest of the year when it isn't Christmas, is that their carefully laid secrecy has made them no less susceptible to the kind of breakup rumors that sneak up on the most prominent of couples—couples who are regulars on social media, who walk red carpets together, who've been married for years!
Chris Hemsworth and Elsa Pataky, a no-drama pair married for almost six years and parents of three, woke up the other day to find themselves the subject of a "living separate lives" story, probably because when one spouse is away filming for months, their lives might start to look pretty separate.
Sorry, long-distance celebs, you're just going to have to start keeping a FaceTime log handy for all of us to check up on.
Anyway, both took to social media to rebut the rumor, but just add them to the list that includes Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson, Ellen DeGeneres and Portia De Rossi, Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith, and Victoria and David Beckham. And though they eventually did split, Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt had broke up a dozen times beforehand according to many headlines through the years.
So it's sweet as well as prudent that Holmes and Foxx have chosen this route, this invisible road that leads to we know not where.
Their celebrity status ensured that, once anyone got wind of their courtship, however slight the breeze, inquiring minds would be invested for the duration. There was no chance that out-of-sight, out-of-mind was going to work in the long run with these two.
But if this is how they've agreed they want it to be, then Katie "TV and movie star and formerly one half of the most talked-about couple on the planet" Holmes and Jamie "Oscar winner, rapper, all-around entertainer and Verizon pitchman" Foxx continue to pull off the impossible.
And no one is the wiser.