Dear every sports league in America: Please make every free agent signing as amazing of a spectacle as NBA star DeAndre Jordan's situation the last couple of days.
It literally had everything.
A player commits to one team, his previous team rushes from their vacations on banana boats in an effort to change his mind, players start using emojis on Twitter to inform everyone of what mode of transportation they are using to get to said player, and then an NBA owner publically calls out the reporting chops of a national reporter.
YES! THANK YOU!
Obviously everyone by now (including my parents) have heard the drama of what team Jordan was going to sign with, but just a little backstory in case you are just now hearing about this for the first time.
Last week, ESPN reported that Jordan, who was an instrumental part of the Los Angeles Clippers last season, had agreed to a maximum deal with the Dallas Mavericks paying him roughly $80 million. Not a lot of time went by before Jordan started getting second thoughts and called Clippers coach Doc Rivers, which led to the team sending a cavalry of players out to convince him to ditch Dallas and return to L.A.
According to the emojis on his Twitter, Clippers star Blake Griffin left his vacation in Hawaii and took a plane, a helicopter and a car to Houston to go meet with Jordan, and Chris Paul tweeted he left a banana boat (and there are photos of this) with Carmelo Anthony, LeBron James and Dwayne Wade to get there as well.
And in the final hours last night, Jordan switched from signing with the Mavericks to return to the Clippers, a victory for twitter emojis everywhere!
Yet one wonders during the final hours of DeAndre-gate last night what Mavericks owner Mark Cuban was doing.
According to famously anti-gay ESPN reporter Chris Broussard, Cuban was driving around Houston like a madman, begging Jordan's family to give him the player's address so he could talk with him. Now this would have been a great reality show.
CORRECTION: Sources: Cuban beside himself. Driving around downtown HOUSTON begging (thru texts) Jordan's family 4 address to DeAndre's home— Chris Broussard (@Chris_Broussard) July 9, 2015
Except, according to Cuban, that info was too good to believe and he fired back one of the greatest Twitter responses ever.
.@Chris_Broussard that's is the dumbest shit Ive ever heard. If you had any ethics u would msg me and I will give u his address— Mark Cuban (@mcuban) July 9, 2015
And from there it got really good, with Cuban even offering $100K to charity for Broussard to show proof that he was even texting with Jordan's family.
@Chris_Broussard post what you have. I have the facts you got lied to— Mark Cuban (@mcuban) July 9, 2015
@Chris_Broussard how about this. You post any proof I was calling/texting his friends asking anything I give 100k to charity of yr choice.— Mark Cuban (@mcuban) July 9, 2015
So far no response from Broussard on if he plans on taking Cuban up on his offer, but all we can say is we hope DeAndre Jordan is a free agent every year.