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Good ol' boy Boone is the proud father of Taleah, 3, an aspiring Toddlers and Tiaras pageant queen. Unlike so many parents these days who are absurdly sensitive to warping their child's fragile psyche in its embryonic stages, Boone makes no effort to dampen his nurturing message of tough love.

While Boone's comments may seem harsh and shocking, bear in mind that by "sucks" what he really means is despicable, talentless waste of human flesh that he curses the day he ever laid eyes upon. 

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Step right up, Boone, and take your rightful place in our cavalcade of d-bags!