The tears are falling like soap opera clichés on The Bachelor as spineless, whiny Ali (not named after Muhammad, it turns out) must choose between her job and staying on the show.
We know it makes no sense, but apparently that's what was in the script. Spoiler alert: She chooses the job. Those tips at Hooters must be really good.
But Jake is heartbroken. His potential wife is gone.
And he can't leave the show himself to pursue his love, or Chris Harrison will deftly, cleanly shoot him with a small yet high caliber handgun at the base of his skull, just above the collar.