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Newly minted veep wannabe Sarah Palin's acceptance speech may have drawn impressive ratings at the Republican National Convention, but don't look for her hopping up and down on Oprah Winfrey's couch anytime soon.

Despite a Drudge Report story this morning claiming a political battle was brewing behind the scenes of Winfrey's daytime talk show, with staff members pushing for the big O to invite Palin to Chicago for sit-down, Winfrey herself has issued a speedy denial.

"This item in today's Drudge Report is categorically untrue," she said in a statement. "There has been absolutely no discussion about having Sarah Palin on my show."

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Well, Kanye West certainly came out swinging. He just needs to work on his follow-through.

Despite a year-old vow to any media outlet that would listen that he would never again show his face on the backstabbing airwaves of MTV—a proclamation made after being relegated to a small stage and shut out despite five nominations at last year's Video Music Awards—West has apparently forgiven and forgotten and signed on to perform at this Sunday's show.

West will join Britney Spears (whom the rapper previously claimed was exploited by the network at last year's wingding) in book-ending the 25th anniversary edition of the VMAs do, with the hip-hop star set to close the night's censor-ready proceedings.

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AP Photo/Chris Pizzello

Let's see. There's Marlon, Tito, Jackie and Randy Jackson flanking sister Janet as the famed brotherly act scored the BMI Icon Award Thursday in L.A. Even La Toya was on hand in the audience.

That still left the reunion a couple icons short. Jermaine was MIA, as was a certain King of Pop. Make that the King of Party Pooping.

Asked of Michael's whereabouts, Marlon cracked: "I think he's in Egypt riding a camel or something."

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• Lily Allen defends the Elton John incident on her MySpace: "I'm not defending my drunkeness because i don't need to, i'm 23 it was an awards ceremony i drank the free champagne, how awful of me."

• Lindsay Lohan turned down a $700,000 offer to pose naked for Playboy, so everyone will just have to keep ogling the Marilyn Monroe pictures.

• Judging by these photos of Michael Phelps at the Playboy Club in Vegas, we can probably stop asking if he has a girlfriend.

• We're kinda sick of hearing Jessica Simpson talk about throwing up and farting. It's probably best she just stick to declaring her love for Tony Romo.

• Amy Winehouse requested 48 bottles of Jack Daniels to show up at a three-day music festival. Only now are organizers worried that she might not show up at all or will be in no state to perform.

We can (almost) forgive Jerry Seinfeld for Bee Movie. But this one just stings.

Microsoft unveiled a new commercial Thursday night featuring the comedian, and to call it underwhelming is an understatement. The ad, which finds a churro-chomping Jerry helping Microsoft founder Bill Gates find the right pair of loafers at a discount shoe store, is so dull, so random and, worst of all, simply not funny, it makes Mac guy Justin Long look like a comic genius. (Although we admit Gates whipping out his Shoe Circus Clown Club card did make us crack a smile.)

Oh yeah, lest we forget, Jer was reportedly paid $10 million to appear in this spot, part of Microsoft's new $300 million campaign.

But that's our two cents. (Certainly not 10 mil!) Have a look and let us know what you think.

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Apparently there's nothing like a good killing spree to get Tom Cruise going.

The actor and his United Artists have snapped up the rights to The Monster of Florence as a potential starring vehicle, according to Variety.

Based on the true-crime thriller by Douglas Preston and Mario Spezi, the book chronicles a three-decade spate of serial murders in the cradle of the Renaissance that served as the inspiration to another big-screen bloodbath, Hannibal.

Preston and Spezi are quoted in the Italian daily Corriere della Sera saying Christopher McQuarrie (who wrote Cruise's forthcoming Valkyrie) will adapt and that Cruise will decide whether to star after giving the script a once-over.

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AP Photo/Kiichiro Sato

Ann and Nancy Wilson are hoping the Republicans change their tune—and aren't planning on waiting until November to find out.

The sisterly duo known as Heart sent a cease-and-desist notice to the McCain-Palin campaign Thursday afternoon after their hit "Barracuda" was used—twice—without permission as the official rallying cry for the vice presidential candidate after her nomination acceptance speech at the Republican National Convention.

The song was chosen as a would-be cute tie-in to Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin's past—"Barracuda" was her high school nickname.

Only problem, campaign officials failed to ask either the group, Universal Music Publishing or Sony BMG whether the song was fair game to use. It wasn't.

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If all goes well for Hollywood, Shia LaBeouf and Zac Efron will be the new Reese Witherspoon.

The fall movie season begins today. Running through Halloween weekend, the next two months will boast plenty of stars, a good number of Oscar contenders, including Oliver Stone's W., but possibly few, if any, box-office blockbusters.

It's been six years, in fact, since any film released in September grossed more than $100 million, Exhibitor Relations reported this week. The last movie to do so was the Witherspoon comedy Sweet Home Alabama.

"If any film [this] September has a chance to break $100 million," says Exhibitor Relations' Jeff Bock, "it's Eagle Eye and Shia LaBeouf."

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The guy accused of stealing a bunch of stuff from Kirsten Dunst is paying for it in spades.

Jarrod Beinerman, 33, was sentenced to four and a half years in jail after pleading guilty to attempted burglary in connection with the theft of a $13,000 Balenciaga bag, an iPod and various other goodies from Dunst's suite last year at the Soho Grand Hotel in Manhattan.

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